If you were instant messaged by SmartSmiley101 at all, and wondering who it was that IMed you with all of those weird things, I apoligize. It was me on somebody's computer.

From: Nina R Russo

To: tomamama29@mchsi.com

Subject: Eating out math

Date: Sun, 30 Mar 2003 23:58:50 -0600

This is pretty neat how it works out.
DON'T CHEAT BY SCROLLING DOWN FIRST.
It takes less than a minute.......
Work this out as you read.
Be sure you don't read the bottom until you've worked it out!
This is not one of those waste of time things; it's fun.
1. First of all, pick the number of times a week that you would like to
have
dinner out. (Try for more than once but less than 10)
2. Multiply this number by 2 (Just to be bold)
3. Add 5. (for Sunday)
4. Multiply it by 50 - I'll wait while you get the
calculator................
5. If you have already had your birthday this year add 1753.... If you
haven't, add 1752..........
6.. Now subtract the four digit year that you were born.
You should have a three digit number .

The first digit of this was your original number
(I.e., how many times you want to eat out each week.)

The next two numbers are...

YOUR AGE! (Oh YES, it IS!!!!!)

THIS IS THE ONLY YEAR (2003) IT WILL EVER WORK, SO SPREAD IT AROUND
WHILE IT LASTS. IMPRESSIVE, ISN'T IT?
============================================

(end e-mail)

Wow, it actually works. Thanks to Nina for the e-mail.

tomamama29: it annoys me especially when people do this!1!!!!111!!!!
AllyDeWacky1: i know
tomamama29: i can understand this?/?
AllyDeWacky1: and they add unneeded z's
AllyDeWacky1: lolz!!!!1!!!!
tomamama29: heh
tomamama29: thatz iz soooz coolz
AllyDeWacky1: kewliez!
tomamama29: LOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOL!11!!!
tomamama29: wow
tomamama29: that was scary
AllyDeWacky1: oH mIe GoD uR wEiRdz!!!!!!!1!1
AllyDeWacky1: lmao
AllyDeWacky1: i know

I like talking to people who instant message me. Even if I have no idea who they are. I have no mercy.


x7xRaC3RcHiKx7x: heeeeyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!!!!!!!!!!!>>> AsL?::*::??
tomamama29: may I ask who's calling?
x7xRaC3RcHiKx7x: calling??
tomamama29: yes
tomamama29: smar
x7xRaC3RcHiKx7x: i ain't calling you!!
tomamama29: yes
x7xRaC3RcHiKx7x: noi
tomamama29: yesi
x7xRaC3RcHiKx7x: buh bye
tomamama29: okay
tomamama29: have a happy birthday
tomamama29: and a merry christmas
tomamama29: and happy haunukah
tomamama29: and remember to stop and talk to your plants!
tomamama29: i do that often!
tomamama29 wants to directly connect.
tomamama29 cancels request; no connection was made.
tomamama29: oopsie
tomamama29: wrong button
tomamama29: we like the moon
tomamama29: bleh
tomamama29: bleh
tomamama29: bleh
tomamama29: soooooooo
tomamama29: are you having fun yet?
x7xRaC3RcHiKx7x: stop f***ing IMin me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
x7xRaC3RcHiKx7x: i don't no u!!!!!
tomamama29: why'd you IM me, then?
x7xRaC3RcHiKx7x: i said bye! and you still iming me!@
tomamama29: yes!
x7xRaC3RcHiKx7x: f***!!!!!!!!!!!
tomamama29: yes!
x7xRaC3RcHiKx7x: bye!!!!!!!
x7xRaC3RcHiKx7x: BYE
x7xRaC3RcHiKx7x: BYE
x7xRaC3RcHiKx7x: BYE
x7xRaC3RcHiKx7x: BYE
tomamama29: three letter word
x7xRaC3RcHiKx7x: BYE
x7xRaC3RcHiKx7x: BYE
tomamama29: bye
tomamama29: it is an interesting word
x7xRaC3RcHiKx7x: F*** U!
tomamama29: happy birthday to you, too!
tomamama29: i don't like homework
x7xRaC3RcHiKx7x: DO I F***IN CARE???????!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
tomamama29: not really, do you?
x7xRaC3RcHiKx7x: WHO IN THE F*** R U?
tomamama29: may I ask who you are?
x7xRaC3RcHiKx7x: MY NAME IS NIKI
x7xRaC3RcHiKx7x: AND YOU???!?!!?!?
tomamama29: you instant messaged me why?
x7xRaC3RcHiKx7x: I DON'T KNOW!!! STOP IMing ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
tomamama29: that's odd
tomamama29: and kind of sad, too
(I'm warned a couple of times.)
tomamama29: but funny
(more warnings)
x7xRaC3RcHiKx7x: STOP!
tomamama29: stop what?
(i warn her a couple of times.)
tomamama29: i like ducks
tomamama29: do you like ducks?
x7xRaC3RcHiKx7x: oooooooooooooooo! i LOVVVEEEEEE ducks!
tomamama29: yay!
tomamama29: ducks!
x7xRaC3RcHiKx7x: i love monkeys tooo!!!!!!!!!1
tomamama29: monkeys and ducks!
x7xRaC3RcHiKx7x: that rulzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
tomamama29: yes!
tomamama29: it rules like a yardstick!
x7xRaC3RcHiKx7x: lololololol that is sooooooooooo funny!!
tomamama29: yes!
tomamama29: funny like...funny things!
x7xRaC3RcHiKx7x: o ya!
tomamama29: you're pretty good at playing along with what i'm saying
x7xRaC3RcHiKx7x: o yes! i know!
tomamama29: heh
x7xRaC3RcHiKx7x: yay
tomamama29: http://ramblingtoma.blogspot.com
tomamama29: where this conversation is going.
x7xRaC3RcHiKx7x: wat is this^??
tomamama29: thank you for amusing me
x7xRaC3RcHiKx7x: o! u r VVVEEERRRYYY welcome!

I think I will start instant messaging people randomly from now on.

CrazyLady8790: im gonna start talking in spanish!
tomamama29: you do that
tomamama29: i'll get out babelfish
CrazyLady8790: ¡Usted huele el extremo de un pescado!
tomamama29: ¡Hola! Pienso que se siente bien permitir que los hámsteres se arrastren arriba y abajo de sus pantalones.
CrazyLady8790: ¡Y voy a decir las porciones de las cosas impares que no tienen
ningún sentido!!!!
tomamama29: ¡Sí! ¡En hecho, decir las cosas que hacen no hay sentido en todo clase de diversión, ahora que usted piensa de ella!
CrazyLady8790: ¡extremo de los pescados de la descomposición!
tomamama29: ¡La gente muerta se descompone! ¡Me descompondré para su placer!
CrazyLady8790: unterschiedlich Sprache!
tomamama29: ja!
CrazyLady8790: ich wie dies ein gut! _ es haben viel lang Wort!
tomamama29: Viel langes Wort zu haben ist gut!
CrazyLady8790: Sie Geruch wie d stossen von ein rotting Fisch!!!!!!
tomamama29: Ich schlage jetzt Leute im Kopf mit großen Stöcken!
CrazyLady8790: Auf Wiedersehen und Sie Geruch!
CrazyLady8790 signed off at 10:27:39 PM.

And yes, it all makes some sense if you translate it.

CrazyLady8790: im beginning to think that when your bored you put odd stuff that ive said on your blog....
tomamama29: like...?
CrazyLady8790: notr when ur bored..... but when you have nothing else to put there
CrazyLady8790: away message and odd messages that i left
tomamama29: yes
CrazyLady8790: yes
CrazyLady8790: very true is it not?
tomamama29: quite

There was once a computer game called "Hunt the Wumpus". We need more games with titles like that.

Wumpus wumpus wumpus. You could use that word for any meaning. As in: "The weather today is very wumpus!" or maybe even, "That tie is soooo wumpusy."

Now that I think about it, "wumpusy" sounds like a disease similar to leprosy. Hmm. A leper, and a wumper? That just sounds wrong.

Wow. I swear, the game Half-Life is very addictive. Download the demo and buy it, and we can be addicted together. And yes, I'm talking to you.

Anyway, school is aponupon back again. And a whole lot of homework for the weekend. Yay.

tomamama29: hello


Auto response from CrazyLady8790: Hi---Im in the bathroom. It is likely that i am pooping, taking a dump, pinchin' a loaf, taking a dump, crapping, or just for Joanna passing a Bowel Movement. I will be back shortly so if its REALLY important leave a message!
~Erin~


tomamama29: a bit too much information, there

I remember getting up early on Saturday mornings to watch "Cartoon Planet". It was a show with Space Ghost and Zorak and Brak on it. Now, not the older 60's and 70's versions-they were more like the charecters on Space Ghost Coast to Coast.

Now, I find this. It's apparently Brak singing "Don't Touch Me", accompanied by a dancing little man. Sadly, Brak isn't credited, but, instead, Adam Sandler, who had no part in making the song. It's different.

Friend Erin has started a blog. I don't know if she's updated it yet, though. Click here.

I can't think of much else to say.

Updated links section with another friend's blog.

I'm starting to loose hope in humanity. Why? I think we're forgetting how to spell.

Really, though. If you think about it, online shorthand and smileys are starting to take over, from chat to blogs. Just go to blogger.com and go to the "recently published blogs" section, and at least one out of those ten blogs very likely have typcial posts like "ok this is so kewl!!1! i jest taked w/ richard! OMGOMG! he sayz hi! LOL!"

Now, I don't mind the occasional shorthanded word. After all, as long as you get your point across, everything is okay. I recently looked at somebody's website and saw a "quotez" (I kid you not) section. These "quotes" were something like this:

"shut up or ill hit you with a brik!"-TIM! LOL!"
Yes, I think humanity is going to one day kill it's self because of a war and we aren't able to understand each other's peace treaties, with commands like "u wil n/ uz nukelr splosins".

I think we should hire kids as critics. What kind of critic? Any kind. A movie critic, food critic, and so on. Just think about it. Five year olds are more honest than thirty-five year olds (compare "I like your hair!" to "That's icky!"), and their less offensive. You know? Nobody cares if a little kid says that the Shrimp with Chicken Marinated in Turkey Broth is "gross", but chefs care if the food critic says something as simple as, "The pizza was, overall, a pizza, but not what you'd call a good pizza.". In fact, some guy who made a restraunt who's five-star rating became a four-star rating committed suicide! And just because of what some food critic thought! Nobody (except for other kids) would run away crying if somebody thought their food was getting worse. Come to think about it, another five year old shouldn't be cooking. They could get hurt, you know, with all of those burners up there. Heck, what if they can't reach? That'd be one stupid parent to get a stepstool for them so they could reach the stovetop.

I added a few new links to the link section. Descriptions:

Ally's Ujournal: An online friend's blog. Very honest blog. She linked to my blog, so why don't I return the favor?
Homestar Runner: I've talked about this one before. Very different, very original. Buy some stuff from the store while you're there, because I just now noticed the site has no advertisements at all.
Joanna's Blog: It's new and by a friend of mine. Not much there, yet, and kind of scary at times.
Cockeyed-One of my favorite sites. You'll spend a lot of time here, believe me.

And, the rent space has finally been rented! Any other takers?

Socergurl7690: do u no w
Socergurl7690: ??
tomamama29: yes
tomamama29: i also know x, y, and z

I'm looking through the archives of this blog, and, boy, some of it isn't pretty. But I still really like my "wok" post.

You know, next to me is an empty bottle of Bawls. Bawls is a high-caffine drink made from some berry found in South America.

Now, an hour or two ago, I finish drinking Bawls. Then, I thought, "Hmmm. This is pretty good. I think I like Bawls.". I then thought about saying that out loud, and realized that I wouldn't, because, one, it doesn't sound all too nice, and, two, nobody else was there. Now, I don't mind talking out loud to myself. It's actually kind of fun to talk to yourself. It's even more funner funnier forget it interesting when somebody hears you talking to yourself, and they ask you, "Who are you talking to?" and you say, "Me.", and they think about that. But that's what I think.

Well, on to the point. There, and then, I thought, "Why would somebody make a drink named Bawls? And how many different Bawls puns are in existance?" I bet you there's at least one Bawls pun or misunderstanding a day. In fact, Greg Dean of "Real Life" made a comic about an incident, and I think it's based on a true story. It's kind of like the game Super Monkey Ball. How many jokes do you think have been made about monkeys and...never mind.

Note to self:
One part of "Away Message" is most likely enough. The rest scares me, and will scare anybody reading it.

Love,
Self-Note that I actually wrote down

Part 1 of "Away Message"

CrazyLady8790: hello

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Auto response from tomamama29: I'm not here right now. I'm at the store.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

CrazyLady8790: fine!
CrazyLady8790: im gonna leave you a plethora of annoying messages!!!!!1
CrazyLady8790: joanna is crazy....
CrazyLady8790: shes more obsessed with pie than you
CrazyLady8790: thats really sad
CrazyLady8790: SHOOT THE MIDGET!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
CrazyLady8790: homestar!!
CrazyLady8790: CrazyLady8790 [10:12 AM]: shes more obsessed with pie than you
CrazyLady8790 [10:12 AM]: thats really sad
CrazyLady8790 [10:12 AM]: SHOOT THE MIDGET!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
CrazyLady8790 [10:13 AM]: homestar!
CrazyLady8790: CrazyLady8790 [10:12 AM]: shes more obsessed with pie than you
CrazyLady8790 [10:12 AM]: thats really sad
CrazyLady8790 [10:12 AM]: SHOOT THE MIDGET!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
CrazyLady8790 [10:13 AM]: homestar!
(She changes her text color to green.)
CrazyLady8790: whatever
CrazyLady8790: this is cool text!
CrazyLady8790: yaaaaaaaaaay!
CrazyLady8790: yay for text!
CrazyLady8790: and for pie!
CrazyLady8790: no not pie....
CrazyLady8790: boston cream pie!
CrazyLady8790: and mustaches!!!!!
CrazyLady8790: evryone like mustaches!!
CrazyLady8790: edgar allen poe mustaches!
CrazyLady8790: po! TINKIEWINKIE! LALA! DIIIIIIPSEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!
CrazyLady8790: lets count rambling instant messages now...
CrazyLady8790: 25!
CrazyLady8790: now 26 rambling Instant messages!!
CrazyLady8790: yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!
CrazyLady8790: yay for rambling on and on!
CrazyLady8790: im gettin good at this!
CrazyLady8790: your a good actor thomas but I KNOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
CrazyLady8790: you know i know!
CrazyLady8790: you cant hide it!!!!!!
CrazyLady8790: noooooo!!!!!!!!!

(End of Part 1.)

Prolouge Prolog Introduction

It all started when I was talking to a very bored friend. Well, the conversation had to end, because I needed to go to the store. I didn't want to log off, so I put up an away message:

"I'm not here right now. I'm at the store."

And all heck broke loose.

Here's one of the more recent websites I found. It's made by a friend (I asked them to try to make a blog.). I don't know if I should be glad somebody else has a blog, or just afraid.

You know, when you're bored, it's very hard to be amused by anything. Then something really strange and "oo-kay" like comes along and you find yourself giggling madly like an idiot. Something that normally, if you had seen it when you were not bored, you'd just say, "That's stupid," and move on to something else. What am I talking about? I'm talking about this. Turn up your speakers, please. If you don't have any, just hum the William Tell Overture (or the Lone Ranger Theme Song, if you don't know what the William Tell Overture sounds like).

Socergurl7690: hey i g2g k nd im cumin tommorrow
tomamama29: huh?
Socergurl7690: to teh play
Socergurl7690 signed off at 4:14:05 PM.

tomamama29: fact
from b3ta:

tomamama29: In the Caribbean there are oysters which can
climb trees. They can also change their sex several times.

Sunshinegirl1690: so can humans

tomamama29: heh heh

Sunshinegirl1690: although, it is frowned upon

tomamama29: yes

Sometimes, you find a site that, for some reason, seems to really amuse you. I think that I have just found a very amusing site.

The site's name? HomeStarRunner.com. When you start out, you're greeted by a chorus of happy, singing children, singing the HomeStarRunner intro:

"Everybody! Everybody!
Everybody! Everybody!"

The children are then graced with HomeStar's singing...

"Evwee-baah-dee! Dee doh doh dee doh!
Evwee-baah-dee! Dee doh doh dee boh!"

Or at least that's what it sounds like. From there, you can play games, watch 'toons, and watch the welcome speech. It's one of the most interesting welcomes I've ever seen. It's also one of those things that make you even more confused than you originally were, with HomeStarRunner himself trying to introduce the site (which ends after 126 takes).

But, there is one great part of the website: StrongBad's e-mails. People send this guy e-mails, and he answers them, using his outdated Compy 386. Try the episode "Techno". It's very interesting, along with the rest of the site.

I think this is one of the best strange sites I've seen in a long time.