What happens when you write something like this after not writing things like this is that you end up with something really messy and awkward. Like a baby taking its first steps, except this baby already learned how to walk. So maybe it's more like a baby taking its first steps, walking for a while, deciding to take a break from walking, and then walking again. God, baby. Why you been slacking so long?
I should also probably mention that I'm not going to edit or proofread this post.
I usually do do that. I go back and look at words or sentences that don't quite work the way that I want them to. And then I fix them or put different words in their place. Nobody usually notices this, but they definitely do notice when I don't.
Actually, I have no idea. It's maybe been about three years since someone actually said that to me. So maybe people just think it instead.
I tried to write a post earlier. In fact, I have it saved as a draft. It is a sad, apologetic post masquerading as a triumphant, inspirational one. I haven't even looked at it since I tried to write it about a month ago. Sometimes you just know that certain things aren't worth revisiting or fixing.
And sometimes you know when to stop talking.
Here's something I wrote during my absence. Actually, I didn't really write it; I said it out loud and my phone dictated it. I wasn't sure what to do with it, but now I think I'll put it here. This is what it said:
When I was a baby, I would shit my pants. It's not something that I'm proud of. And it's not something that I do now. But it was something that I had to do – something I had to do so that I wouldn't shit my pants when I was older. So I used to shit my pants. And that was a necessary thing.Anyway, hi again.